Now and then I need to step back and reevaluate why I do what do.
In everything.
The latter part of 2013 brought moments of contemplation for me that really led me to slow down
Breathe deeply
And focus on what was directly in front of me.
Sometimes I get so consumed in the big picture,
My desire to make an impact on the world,
That I forget that the world is right in front of me-
In the faces of the ones who are my world.
So, I stepped back.
Reassessed.
And took a break from my daydreams of world changing.
I daydream about travelling to exotic lands to
Hold in my arms orphan babies
Touch the lined faces of women whose language I do not speak
View the smiles of aged men who've walked paths I've never seen
Scale mountains I've only seen in pictures
Gaze upon a sunrise knowing my homeland tucks in for the night.
I may never get to do these things.
But what I do get to experience can take my breath away
If I will only let it.
My one-foot-in-childhood/one-foot-in-adolescence daughter begging to read Dr. Seuss to me at bedtime.
My man-child asking me ALL of the questions, grown-up questions, late into the night on Christmas Eve.
Mealtime at the table.
Bike riding and hiking.
Disciplining as my children grow into young adults.
Witnessing the student overcoming fear and speaking with confidence.
Listening to the young man jabber on in my office about his own dreams to change the world.
Watching young people exit my classroom with skills and confidence to take on their dreams.
Each of us is a world-changer.
It begins
Today.
Now.
Change the world right where you stand.
And if we all change the corner of the world in which we live,
The whole world changes.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Monday, October 14, 2013
Only 5 Months Till My Birthday!
And I know what I want.
(Now, c'mon. You know I'm not the only one who plans ahead for their special day)
The Hands of Mercy Outreach Center is a local, non-profit community outreach center which assists those in need in the community whether it be through food, clothing, utility bill assistance, etc. They hold quarterly Food Pantries where members of the area can come and get much needed grocery and household items. I have had the pleasure of assisting the Center in their mobile pantries and by donating gently used clothing and household items.
They have recently begun a Weekend Feeding Program which sends a bag of food discreetly in a child's backpack for the weekend. Here's a hard truth: many of the children in our community do not eat nutritious food, if at all, when they are not at school. Many do not eat from the time they leave lunch until they arrive at school the next morning and are served breakfast. Many have precious little to eat over the weekend. This is serving a great need. It took a lot of prayer, hard work and great perseverance to make it happen, and I am so proud that it did.
Here is why I share:
It takes approximately $160 to feed one child for the year.
This is what I want for my birthday:
If merely 15 of my friends will donate $10 for this cause, together we can feed a child for a year in this program.
10 bucks.
I don't need another candle.
I don't need a bottle of lotion.
The good Lord knows I need no jewelry.
But these children.
Need.
Food.
Would you consider partnering with me in this cause?
Consider it my birthday present.
I am donating my birthday to the Hands of Mercy Outreach Center.
My goal: One child for the year.
(Two including the child I plan to sponsor myself).
Pray about this.
I am working on living with more Intentionality.
Ask God if He is indeed leading you to serve others in this capacity.
If His answer is yes, please join with me.
You have months to join and I WILL be reminding you.
You will be feeding a hungry child in your own backyard in the name of the Savior.
What more could one ask for on a birthday?
Sunday, October 13, 2013
The Purpose-Driven Nancy
Intentionality.
That's weighing heavy on my mind.
It's why I purge.
It's behind my attempt at the 333 Project.
It's the purpose behind my porch time.
I've lived the day-in day-out life of status quo and excuses and negativity.
It didn't work for me.
My life crumbled as a result.
And I learned the value of Intentionality:
Living every day - and moment - with purposeful intention.
I often fall short.
The housework builds and bills stack up and the children...
Why oh why must they be fed every.single.day?
But there is grace.
The precious gift of redemption.
That whisper that reminds me that tomorrow is new and fresh
Filled to the brim with another cup of mercy to strengthen me in my weaknesses.
And I refocus once more on...
Intention.
Purpose.
Making conscious choices rather than falling prey to the "it is what it is" mentality.
These past few days the Spirit has whispered over and over to me...
"Intentionality."
It's time for me to dig a little deeper into my heart to search out my purpose and focus.
To allow Him into the depths that I've hidden away as I've taken on new roles and assumed bigger responsibilities these past couple of years.
To allow myself to be stretched once more deeply out of my comfort zone so that I can be more fully His.
To put my money where my mouth is.
To let go of my attachment to 'stuff'.
To ensure my treasure is eternal.
Intention.
It's mind and heart transformed into Action.
That's weighing heavy on my mind.
It's why I purge.
It's behind my attempt at the 333 Project.
It's the purpose behind my porch time.
I've lived the day-in day-out life of status quo and excuses and negativity.
It didn't work for me.
My life crumbled as a result.
And I learned the value of Intentionality:
Living every day - and moment - with purposeful intention.
I often fall short.
The housework builds and bills stack up and the children...
Why oh why must they be fed every.single.day?
But there is grace.
The precious gift of redemption.
That whisper that reminds me that tomorrow is new and fresh
Filled to the brim with another cup of mercy to strengthen me in my weaknesses.
And I refocus once more on...
Intention.
Purpose.
Making conscious choices rather than falling prey to the "it is what it is" mentality.
These past few days the Spirit has whispered over and over to me...
"Intentionality."
It's time for me to dig a little deeper into my heart to search out my purpose and focus.
To allow Him into the depths that I've hidden away as I've taken on new roles and assumed bigger responsibilities these past couple of years.
To allow myself to be stretched once more deeply out of my comfort zone so that I can be more fully His.
To put my money where my mouth is.
To let go of my attachment to 'stuff'.
To ensure my treasure is eternal.
Intention.
It's mind and heart transformed into Action.
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
It Really Is This Simple
Walking toward the exit, the once-orphaned now full grown man turns to the woman and says, "Thank you for loving me all those years ago."
She replies, eyes smiling, "Isn't that what it's all about?"
Fade Out.
This was the final scene in a family movie I viewed with my children this past weekend.
A simple, yet profound final statement:
Love.
Isn't that what it's all about?
While I was attending graduate school in Memphis, Tennessee, every semester at least once, a gentleman came and stood on the corner across the road from the Communication building and shouted to students entering campus,
"Repent! The kingdom of God is near! Turn from your sinful ways! Repent!"
While holding a large sign which condemned sinners to hell.
No student ever stopped to talk with this man.
I witnessed sneers and laughter and scoffing. Not repentance.
Finally, unable to walk away again, I went to the man and asked,
"Out of curiosity, how many students have you led to the foot of Jesus?"
He was silent.
I asked again, "Are your methods effective at saving the lost?"
He could not answer.
His intentions were possibly right.
His method was intensely wrong.
How many people are led to the foot of the cross by condemnation?
How many lost are taught the intense love of their Creator and Savior through shouting?
I have my guesses at answers to these questions.
But that is not my main point.
Here is the heart of the matter:
Love.
The apostle Paul tells us this in his letter to the Corintians.
God said it Himself when He chose a tortuous death over eternity without me.
So, why am I saying anything else?
Am I saying to compromise convictions?
Not at all.
But why is that an either/or option?
It isn't.
Love.
Love People.
It really is what it's all about.
That.
And.
Nothing.
Else.
She replies, eyes smiling, "Isn't that what it's all about?"
Fade Out.
This was the final scene in a family movie I viewed with my children this past weekend.
A simple, yet profound final statement:
Love.
Isn't that what it's all about?
While I was attending graduate school in Memphis, Tennessee, every semester at least once, a gentleman came and stood on the corner across the road from the Communication building and shouted to students entering campus,
"Repent! The kingdom of God is near! Turn from your sinful ways! Repent!"
While holding a large sign which condemned sinners to hell.
No student ever stopped to talk with this man.
I witnessed sneers and laughter and scoffing. Not repentance.
Finally, unable to walk away again, I went to the man and asked,
"Out of curiosity, how many students have you led to the foot of Jesus?"
He was silent.
I asked again, "Are your methods effective at saving the lost?"
He could not answer.
His intentions were possibly right.
His method was intensely wrong.
How many people are led to the foot of the cross by condemnation?
How many lost are taught the intense love of their Creator and Savior through shouting?
I have my guesses at answers to these questions.
But that is not my main point.
Here is the heart of the matter:
Love.
The apostle Paul tells us this in his letter to the Corintians.
God said it Himself when He chose a tortuous death over eternity without me.
So, why am I saying anything else?
Am I saying to compromise convictions?
Not at all.
But why is that an either/or option?
It isn't.
Love.
Love People.
It really is what it's all about.
That.
And.
Nothing.
Else.
333 Begins Today
The 333 Project:
I shared on Facebook that I am beginning this tomorrow.
This is an experiment in minimalism for me.
33 items for 3 months: October through December.
Included items are clothing, accessories and shoes.
Excluded items are under-things, sleepwear, and workout wear.
I am no legalist so I have opted for a couple of exceptions to the rules:
1. October is starting rather warm so I plan to include a handful of warmer weather items for here and there until the weather remains cool. (If it remains warm for much longer, I will push my experiment to November-January). The part of the country you live in must be factored in to the timing.
2. I am excluding weekend/lounging around clothes. My 33 items will be for work, church/public worship time, and going out.
3. I am excluding outerwear. The 333 project includes jackets and coats.
As someone who has pursued a more minimalist perspective for a little while now, I am looking forward to this journey. It was a challenge as I spent quite a while this past Friday going through my clothes and thinking through the weather changes and holidays of the next three months. I like to plan ahead, but this took that to a whole new level. And, at first I thought this would be a fun challenge. As fun as it really has been, it's been more of a challenge than I expected. I began to plan through some basic clothing options in order to create multiple outfits. Once I began to add accessories and then shoes...the numbers began adding up. Then, as I hung all of my clothing options together in one section of the closet so that I would keep track of what I have chosen and have to select from for the next three months, I turned and looked at the remaining clothes in my closet...
Now, let me remind you that I have been on a purging trend for the last couple of years and have easily cut my wardrobe in half over that time. That being said, I was amazed at what all remained in my closet that I declared 'unusable' for the next three months.
That's the point. At least for me.
I think I'm doing well at using my resources and decluttering and eliminating the unnecessary.
I needed an opportunity to take a deeper look at what I own - at what I consider valuable.
I urge you to look into the 333 project.
Read blogs such as
www.becomingminimalist.com
and
www.theothersideofcomplexity.com
They can encourage you and shed light in a clearer way than I can, that's for sure.
But, I guess I mainly share this so that you can know why I will continue to wear the same basic clothes over the next few months ;)
I'll try to create some variety with accessories.
My poor students - they'll think I own no other clothes.
Maybe, just maybe, this will open a door to conversation.
More than that, I am hoping to re-kindle the embers in my heart of a desire for less.
To get my focus back on what is truly important.
Less does equal more.
I think it's time to dive into that more deeply.
I shared on Facebook that I am beginning this tomorrow.
This is an experiment in minimalism for me.
33 items for 3 months: October through December.
Included items are clothing, accessories and shoes.
Excluded items are under-things, sleepwear, and workout wear.
I am no legalist so I have opted for a couple of exceptions to the rules:
1. October is starting rather warm so I plan to include a handful of warmer weather items for here and there until the weather remains cool. (If it remains warm for much longer, I will push my experiment to November-January). The part of the country you live in must be factored in to the timing.
2. I am excluding weekend/lounging around clothes. My 33 items will be for work, church/public worship time, and going out.
3. I am excluding outerwear. The 333 project includes jackets and coats.
As someone who has pursued a more minimalist perspective for a little while now, I am looking forward to this journey. It was a challenge as I spent quite a while this past Friday going through my clothes and thinking through the weather changes and holidays of the next three months. I like to plan ahead, but this took that to a whole new level. And, at first I thought this would be a fun challenge. As fun as it really has been, it's been more of a challenge than I expected. I began to plan through some basic clothing options in order to create multiple outfits. Once I began to add accessories and then shoes...the numbers began adding up. Then, as I hung all of my clothing options together in one section of the closet so that I would keep track of what I have chosen and have to select from for the next three months, I turned and looked at the remaining clothes in my closet...
Now, let me remind you that I have been on a purging trend for the last couple of years and have easily cut my wardrobe in half over that time. That being said, I was amazed at what all remained in my closet that I declared 'unusable' for the next three months.
That's the point. At least for me.
I think I'm doing well at using my resources and decluttering and eliminating the unnecessary.
I needed an opportunity to take a deeper look at what I own - at what I consider valuable.
I urge you to look into the 333 project.
Read blogs such as
www.becomingminimalist.com
and
www.theothersideofcomplexity.com
They can encourage you and shed light in a clearer way than I can, that's for sure.
But, I guess I mainly share this so that you can know why I will continue to wear the same basic clothes over the next few months ;)
I'll try to create some variety with accessories.
My poor students - they'll think I own no other clothes.
Maybe, just maybe, this will open a door to conversation.
More than that, I am hoping to re-kindle the embers in my heart of a desire for less.
To get my focus back on what is truly important.
Less does equal more.
I think it's time to dive into that more deeply.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
When My Love for Man Grows Weak
A friend of mine recently wrote about being in a funk.
I think we all get there from time to time. Our funks may be different in cause and content, but we all have those moments when we are just discontent, troubled, weary or even 'done.'
Her writings about her funk forced me to stop and do some hard thinking.
And admitting.
I, too, have been in a funk.
She was questioned on whether or not she was having a crisis of faith-which she was not.
Neither am I.
This is not a crisis of faith or a questioning of God or a struggle in the darkness of trial.
It is simply, for lack of a better way of putting it, a mind funk.
And when I have these seasons of, let's call it 'funkiness', I tend to get quiet.
Because, quite frankly, I don't know what to say.
That.
That right there.
That frustrates me to no end.
I am a problem solver. I want to assess and then fix. I want to fix my funk. I want the answers so I can enact solutions and solve the problems.
I want out of my funk.
But - sometimes there are no answers. At least, not the kind I've been searching for, anyway.
My funk does not stem from trial or a wavering trust in the Father and His plan and purpose.
My funk stems from people.
They annoy me.
Especially when I expect them to know, and act, better.
It is not news that a deep part of me wants to change the world.
It is not a new thing to hear me say that I am weary of the status quo.
It is not surprising when I come up with another way of challenging the system and myself out of 'doing things the way they've always been done by everyone else.'
I like to swim upstream. I like to be different. I am not a bandwagon type of gal.
And I get beyond weary of doing the same thing over and over expecting different results.
(Insanity, anyone?)
I also get weary of talking things to death.
I want to be a woman of action. I want to try it and see and if it fails, then I learned something for next time.
But, at least, I did something.
I didn't sit around thinking it to death and ultimately deciding it wouldn't work anyway so I gave up.
No - I want to be known at the woman who went out there and gave it her best shot.
And I am sick.to.death. of procedures and committees and meetings and bureaucracy.
Before you 'amen' me...be sure to ask the begging question:
"So, what do you do, then?"
*crickets*
That's where you stump me.
I don't have the answers.
That is where I struggle.
And pray.
And beg God to send me where He needs me to be used.
Because where I am right now is not it.
I don't need to be exalted.
But I want to be needed.
I want to be needed and valued as part of the believing family of God changing the world.
I cannot let the funk win. Because it sees victory as my relenting to the status quo.
And I cannot let that happen.
But what I, and we, are doing - Is.Not.Working.
Something has to give.
Ever been there? Feeling that sense of pushing from the Spirit urging you forward?
Something has to change.
My prayer becomes, once again,
"Lord, change ME."
I think we all get there from time to time. Our funks may be different in cause and content, but we all have those moments when we are just discontent, troubled, weary or even 'done.'
Her writings about her funk forced me to stop and do some hard thinking.
And admitting.
I, too, have been in a funk.
She was questioned on whether or not she was having a crisis of faith-which she was not.
Neither am I.
This is not a crisis of faith or a questioning of God or a struggle in the darkness of trial.
It is simply, for lack of a better way of putting it, a mind funk.
And when I have these seasons of, let's call it 'funkiness', I tend to get quiet.
Because, quite frankly, I don't know what to say.
That.
That right there.
That frustrates me to no end.
I am a problem solver. I want to assess and then fix. I want to fix my funk. I want the answers so I can enact solutions and solve the problems.
I want out of my funk.
But - sometimes there are no answers. At least, not the kind I've been searching for, anyway.
My funk does not stem from trial or a wavering trust in the Father and His plan and purpose.
My funk stems from people.
They annoy me.
Especially when I expect them to know, and act, better.
It is not news that a deep part of me wants to change the world.
It is not a new thing to hear me say that I am weary of the status quo.
It is not surprising when I come up with another way of challenging the system and myself out of 'doing things the way they've always been done by everyone else.'
I like to swim upstream. I like to be different. I am not a bandwagon type of gal.
And I get beyond weary of doing the same thing over and over expecting different results.
(Insanity, anyone?)
I also get weary of talking things to death.
I want to be a woman of action. I want to try it and see and if it fails, then I learned something for next time.
But, at least, I did something.
I didn't sit around thinking it to death and ultimately deciding it wouldn't work anyway so I gave up.
No - I want to be known at the woman who went out there and gave it her best shot.
And I am sick.to.death. of procedures and committees and meetings and bureaucracy.
Before you 'amen' me...be sure to ask the begging question:
"So, what do you do, then?"
*crickets*
That's where you stump me.
I don't have the answers.
That is where I struggle.
And pray.
And beg God to send me where He needs me to be used.
Because where I am right now is not it.
I don't need to be exalted.
But I want to be needed.
I want to be needed and valued as part of the believing family of God changing the world.
I cannot let the funk win. Because it sees victory as my relenting to the status quo.
And I cannot let that happen.
But what I, and we, are doing - Is.Not.Working.
Something has to give.
Ever been there? Feeling that sense of pushing from the Spirit urging you forward?
Something has to change.
My prayer becomes, once again,
"Lord, change ME."
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Why Minimalism?
If you've followed me much here or on Twitter or Facebook, you know that I am actively pursuing a more minimalist lifestyle. I read blogs and books that encourage more simple living and making conscious choices to assist my family in living a less chaotic life.
It's possible that some folks may think that I have allowed my pursuit of simplicity to overshadow my faith and walk with the Great Love, my Father. But that could not be less true. You see, I see the two as inherently connected. In my journey, the one cannot go without the Other.
Life is hectic. And often crazy and mostly chaotic. Work and kids and schedules and house and yard and activities and weekends and...and...and...
More often than not, we spend entirely too much time simply running from one thing to the next on autopilot.
^^^
This is what I am trying to abandon in my life. That chaos negatively affect my daily peace, my energy, my relationships with my family and loved ones, and my relationship with the Father. You, too, may find yourself spending more time than you care to admit simply surviving from one moment/activity/event to the next.
Is your kitchen a disaster?
Do you have more than one 'junk drawer'?
Do you have a location where all mail/bills get dumped that is overflowing in papers and clutter?
Do you have a pile of clean and/or dirty laundry waiting to be addressed at all times?
Let's go further...
Do you have books you've never read or have read multiple times just taking up space?
Do you still have toys/clothes from your children's younger years that they do not/cannot use?
Do you still have clothes in your own closet you never wear?
These are only a few examples. But here is my point:
Any and everything like this that takes away from my time with my children and the Father is time wasted. So, I began to simplify. Eliminate. Clean out.
I got weary of my time being so wasted.
I am not 'there' yet. I am not where I desire to be. But I am getting there. Since I began this journey around 2 years ago, I find that cleaning up, putting away, straightening up takes significantly less time than it used to. One tip I've heard often is to spend a little time cleaning up each day so that things don't pile up. I want to take it a step further. Eliminating the majority of the 'junk' around my house has automatically shaved hours off of my clean up time. There's less to clean up. It is that simple.
How often do you feel guilty for sitting and relaxing with your favorite steamy beverage because you have 'so much to do'? If you eliminate part of your 'to do' list, you have more time...
To rest
To breathe
To meditate
To pray
For me, this movement toward simplicity and minimalism has been a movement to live a more purposeful life. I make more conscious decisions about what we do and when. I also am more keenly aware of the god of 'stuff' that this culture has bowed in reverence to for far too long. Eliminating more and more 'stuff' from my possession has freed me to focus on the worship the Creator of all things rather than the things themselves.
Like I said, I am still finding my way. Having a few full-time job has presented new challenges along the way. But God provides assistance along the way when I need it.
The bottom line is I am done with the auto-pilot life. Sometimes that means throwing something away. Sometimes that means saying "No." Sometimes that means doing things differently than others around me and getting funny looks along the way.
And I am totally ok with that.
It's not the first time and surely won't be the last.
;)
It's possible that some folks may think that I have allowed my pursuit of simplicity to overshadow my faith and walk with the Great Love, my Father. But that could not be less true. You see, I see the two as inherently connected. In my journey, the one cannot go without the Other.
Life is hectic. And often crazy and mostly chaotic. Work and kids and schedules and house and yard and activities and weekends and...and...and...
More often than not, we spend entirely too much time simply running from one thing to the next on autopilot.
^^^
This is what I am trying to abandon in my life. That chaos negatively affect my daily peace, my energy, my relationships with my family and loved ones, and my relationship with the Father. You, too, may find yourself spending more time than you care to admit simply surviving from one moment/activity/event to the next.
Is your kitchen a disaster?
Do you have more than one 'junk drawer'?
Do you have a location where all mail/bills get dumped that is overflowing in papers and clutter?
Do you have a pile of clean and/or dirty laundry waiting to be addressed at all times?
Let's go further...
Do you have books you've never read or have read multiple times just taking up space?
Do you still have toys/clothes from your children's younger years that they do not/cannot use?
Do you still have clothes in your own closet you never wear?
These are only a few examples. But here is my point:
Any and everything like this that takes away from my time with my children and the Father is time wasted. So, I began to simplify. Eliminate. Clean out.
I got weary of my time being so wasted.
I am not 'there' yet. I am not where I desire to be. But I am getting there. Since I began this journey around 2 years ago, I find that cleaning up, putting away, straightening up takes significantly less time than it used to. One tip I've heard often is to spend a little time cleaning up each day so that things don't pile up. I want to take it a step further. Eliminating the majority of the 'junk' around my house has automatically shaved hours off of my clean up time. There's less to clean up. It is that simple.
How often do you feel guilty for sitting and relaxing with your favorite steamy beverage because you have 'so much to do'? If you eliminate part of your 'to do' list, you have more time...
To rest
To breathe
To meditate
To pray
For me, this movement toward simplicity and minimalism has been a movement to live a more purposeful life. I make more conscious decisions about what we do and when. I also am more keenly aware of the god of 'stuff' that this culture has bowed in reverence to for far too long. Eliminating more and more 'stuff' from my possession has freed me to focus on the worship the Creator of all things rather than the things themselves.
Like I said, I am still finding my way. Having a few full-time job has presented new challenges along the way. But God provides assistance along the way when I need it.
The bottom line is I am done with the auto-pilot life. Sometimes that means throwing something away. Sometimes that means saying "No." Sometimes that means doing things differently than others around me and getting funny looks along the way.
And I am totally ok with that.
It's not the first time and surely won't be the last.
;)
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