Truth.
And meaning is not in our stuff.
There are voices and blogs and reports ad nauseam detailing how over-committed, over-extended, over-worked, over-distracted our lives are. I am not going to add to that. Few disagree.
Let's move on.
What are we going to do about it?
It's time to quit lamenting and start doing.
The first step is:
With. Me.
I defeat myself and my purpose when I lament all I cannot do. When I sit in woe over all of the injustices of the world and feel helpless.
You are not helpless.
Neither am I.
So, I will begin where I can and make changes that CAN change the world.
Starting at home.
I begin every day looking into the face of the future in the faces of my brilliant, creative, talented, unique, headstrong, bossy, sometimes grumpy faces of my children.
When I say "I can't," I am telling them, "You can't."
Ouch.
My belief: start with the little things. They grow into big things.
I purge. I have done this often over the last couple of years and I am not remotely done. Those of you who follow me on Facebook know my journey. I am tired of being owned by my stuff. And slowly, but surely, I am getting free. I am in love with empty spaces, and shelves, and corners. My time is freer because I am spending less of it cleaning and organizing and locating what I cannot find. I have utilized resources galore which have kept me motivated and encouraged.
I read books and blogs on minimalism. They focus my goals.
And then, I purge some more.
It's therapeutic!
(Sometimes, the children fear they will be tossed into a box labeled "Goodwill" or "Hands of Mercy Center")
We turn off the technology.
(Before you say it, YES. You CAN!)
We took a week long fast from all things tech, excluding needs for work and homework:
No iPods, DS, Wii, computer, Facebook, etc.
It was a cold-turkey rebooting of the minds. It CAN be done. We found ourselves doing other things: playing games, baking, playing outside, riding bikes, reading. Enjoying the quiet and freedom from constant distraction.
Then, we implemented a one-day-a-week tech break. Every Monday - the only exclusions are the needs that accompany my work or their homework. Other than that, nope.
Yes, there are pouty moments. I will not tell you that we sit in bliss reading the classics while Pa plays his fiddle. But, we do play outside, and ride bikes, talk more over supper and laugh.
(And, as bedtime nears, if we've done well on the break, we may end the day playing Wii sports TOGETHER). I cut myself some slack. We are not Nazis.
We declared supper time: Sacred Time. We've had sit down suppers since the kids were babies. I have always heard friends whose children were older than mine speak on the importance of family dinner at the table. Now, instead of rushing through dinner to get from one place to the next, we slowed down. I make sure there is time for them to help because they both love to help make supper. And, when food is on the table, phones, iPods, etc are OFF and we enjoy each other. Confession here: I have often allowed the non-emergency messages to interrupt this time with my kids, if even for a few seconds. Now, they have my undivided attention over supper. And we laugh and talk more. With purpose or not. We just talk. And eat. And enjoy each other's company more. And we clean the kitchen together. It is an uninterrupted hour of real joy. Yes, we annoy each other often. Yes, there are nights we cannot do this (I teach one night a week and, presently, two nights a week). Those times, I relinquish the guilt of fast food suppers and commit that once the schedule settles back to normal, we will resume the normalcy.
Don't wait until your kids are teens to see this importance. By then, it may be too late.
Who cares if the extent of your conversations are over who-said-what-goofy-thing in the car rider line today? Listen to your kids. Listen now, and they will continue to talk to you later. When the topics are deeper.
Remember, it was over preparing supper that my son began the conversation about his Savior that would lead to the changing of his life.
These moments
ARE
That. Important.
Plan ahead - make menus. At the beginning of the week, we discuss supper so I can shop for the week. I know this is difficult. But, the truth is, it is not that time-consuming. A few minutes planning saves me hours during the week when I do not want to decide what's for dinner and find no ingredients in the kitchen.
Sabbath. I've never done this before. This one - the biggest challenge.
This one requires much planning ahead. MUCH.
My desire: to begin Saturday night with supper, prayer time, and a deep family-breath as we embark on 24 hours of rest and focus. Nothing we "have" to do. Rest, worship, play, etc.
BUT - this one is a challenge when A) every other weekend they are away from me and B) so many commitments from the outside world are on the weekends and C) if I have been too busy during the week the only time I have to catch up is on the weekend.
So, we are still learning and navigating this one. We do it when we can. It has become a regular topic of conversation within the family now and at least is an issue of conscious thought that we strive for. It's a beginning. We'll get there.
Family Bible Study:
How many of you leave Bible study to your Sunday school teachers?
(My hand is the first in the air).
Yet, deep inside the main influence I want on my children regarding the Word, and who God is, is me. Not their youth minister, or Bible class teacher or anyone else. Not because I am a control freak. But because I want them to grow up knowing, knowing, knowing that God is at the heart of who I am.
And for some of us, due to lifestyles either of choice or not, this presents a challenge.
We began at Christmas studying, even for 10 minutes together on Sunday nights before bed, about the life of Christ from His birth to His death. We are now on the fruits of the Spirit.
I am no theologian. There are many significantly more qualified to teach the Word of God. I do not have a denomination-sanctioned curriculum. We just, my children and I, read the scripture. We ask questions. We think together. And we pray.
And, truth: these have led to some of the sweetest, deepest, (sometimes) tearful conversations we have ever had. And then we hold hands, and we pray. And we pray specifically for what is directly affecting our family. Our future. We tell God what we want (Phil 4:5-7) and then we commit our lives to His will (Matt 6:9-13). We learn faith and trust. And love for each other as we share our hearts.
My point: none of these ideas are hard. They are a challenge. They do take some forethought and planning. None take too much time. I do not have it all together.
I just decided that I HAD to START.
Somewhere.
Time. What is most important?
You CAN change the world.
I have chosen to begin with MY world first.
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